it came on me suddenly

A few - though not technically, because there are only two - things I just realised:

• I am a Cancer. 'Any of various malignant neoplasms characterized by the proliferation of anaplastic cells that tend to invade surrounding tissue and metastasize to new body sites.' ' A pernicious, spreading evil.' That's a terrible thing to be.
• Jimmy Carter is still alive.

More on this later.